Is it conceited to just ‘be’ a model?
I mean, a model’s money is made based on their looks. So most often, a model is aware that when they go off to a job they are presenting themselves as marketable, appealing. If they are aware of the physical attraction that they create, and put that front forward, then is that necessarily conceited? Obviously, I’m not exactly sure… I surely hope that just because a person is a model, that doesn’t make them conceited.
I have been a model since my sophomore year in high school. I have done some pretty wicked jobs, spent some time in some beautiful venues, and been a part of stuff most other people only dream of doing. Now, you must realize that I am no big time model. I am not one that is posted on billboards across Times Square. I haven’t even booked any well paying jobs worth the trip to NYC in the last 4 months. Let me reiterate that: I have booked 2 extraordinary jobs in the last short bit of time, but not been allowed to work because of… well… let’s call it ‘circumstances’. Anyways, that is beside the point. But up until now, I haven’t really talked much about it. My motto was:
If you don’t make a big deal out of it, then no one else will.
And just as I predicted, no one really made a big deal of it. Yeah, there have been a few instances where I have slipped up in class, or my sister (who is also a model) mentioned it, that people have been like “oh, what? Kos is a MODEL!?!”, but other than those few occasions I have had no other incidents. I just kept it on the down low.
I think I did so because so many people associate models with some different things, some good, but in my opinion, more bad. As I said verbatim before, most people think of models as these beautiful people who get paid big bucks to have their bodies made into glorified ads and posters. Yep, that is sort of true I guess, but I had spent so much time and effort for so many years conjuring up this good Angelic child do no wrong persona and if people knew that I took random trips to model, I thought they would look at me different. Not necessarily in a negative way, but still different. Not many people here in my small town outside of a big city really get the whole modeling biz. I am not at all attempting to say that they are small minded or ignorant, but most just don’t understand that I do the modeling to help support my family and make something of myself outside of this shell of a life, not to be pompous and proud of my 'looks' or whatever.
Yeah yeah, some models may be conceited. Sure, I have met lots of them like that, but I have tried my best to set that aspect aside. So now after sitting here typing this bit, I have come to a revelation: I just need to get over this whole sticking to this being normal jazz. I need to diverge. Not essentially be a crazed maniac, but at least be my own self. Let people take me the way they want, it shouldn’t embarrass me anymore... I think
